


Playing House

by Spiral_Rush



Series: House [2]
Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: Canon Divergence, Difficult Decisions, F/M, Fatherhood, Guilt, Late Night Conversations, Old Friends, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:47:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21522415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spiral_Rush/pseuds/Spiral_Rush
Summary: While visiting home, Frank discusses plans for the future with Billy.***Every time Frank saw his kids, they were a few inches taller. Every time he saw them, they had new teachers, new friends, new sports, new after school activities. Maria always sent him pictures and videos and told him everything that was going on but it wasn't the same as being in the middle of it day-to-day. This afternoon, he asked Lisa how softball was going, not remembering that volleyball season had started."I just hate missing so much of them growing up," Frank said.Billy slowly moved his half-empty mug in a circle. He looked at Frank and asked, "You thinking about getting out?"Frank hadn't intended to talk about it tonight. But since Billy brought it up, he admitted, "Yeah."
Relationships: Frank Castle & Billy Russo, Frank Castle/Maria Castle
Series: House [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1565953
Kudos: 17
Collections: Fortune Favors: Round One— Rider-Waite-Smith





	Playing House

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Fortune Favors, A Tarot Inspired Fest](https://fortune-favors.dreamwidth.org/) November 2019
> 
> Prompt Cards: Hermit, Moon, Eight of Swords
> 
> Deck: Rider-Waite-Smith

Frank always had trouble sleeping when he first got home. 

Tonight, Lisa and Frank Jr. had stayed up hours past their bedtime talking to him. They practically vibrated with excitement just being with Frank. He never got used to them being so _happy_ to have him back. In the moment of reunion, he always felt like he never wanted to leave his family again for any reason.

After the kids reluctantly went to their rooms, Frank and Maria enjoyed some long-overdue time to themselves. Now, she was asleep but he was still wide awake. And it was more than jet lag and the high of being home again keeping him up. 

Whenever he had things to think about, he felt the urge to move around. Rather than toss and turn all night disrupting his wife's rest or putter around the house and risk waking the kids, he decided to go for a walk. Frank kissed Maria gently on the top of her head and dressed. He checked on his slumbering son and daughter -- Frank Jr. snored lightly -- before slipping outside. 

At three in the morning, New York was as quiet as it ever got. On the opposite side of the street, a guy talked on his phone while walking a dog. Passing an open window, Frank heard a TV show with a laugh track. He recognized Colonel Klink from Hogan's Heroes and smiled slightly. In the distance, a siren wailed.

A text message alert cut through the ambient noise. Frank dug his phone out of his pocket. It was Billy. 

_You up?_

_Yeah._

_I don't want to interrupt anything but I'm not far from the neighborhood._ This was followed by a string of phallic-shaped vegetables and a devil emoji.

Frank snorted. _I wouldn't have answered if I was busy._

Billy apologized for not being able to greet him at the airport. Frank suggested they meet at the 24-hour diner several blocks away from his house. When Billy agreed, he turned in that direction.

The place was empty except for a group of college-age kids who looked like they'd been out clubbing. One of them was loudly complaining that another had gotten glitter on her pancakes. Frank chuckled quietly and settled into a booth in the corner. From here, he could see the entire restaurant and most of the street outside.

By the time Billy arrived, Frank had already finished a cup of coffee and almost all of a piece of blueberry pie. His friend glanced at the college students, who were laughing hysterically, before heading over to Frank. 

"Frankie," Billy said, coming in for a hug.

"Hey, Bill." Frank stood up and put his arms around Billy. He got a whiff of woodsy cologne. "You out having fun tonight?"

"I wish," Billy said. "Just dealing with business."

Frank sat back down. "At this hour?" Billy was wearing jeans and a leather jacket, not exactly business wear.

"It's tomorrow afternoon in the Middle East," Billy said, settling opposite Frank. A waitress appeared with a coffee pot and he accepted a cup. "I see you're working on your dad bod," he added, inclining his head towards the remains of the pie.

Frank ate the rest in one large bite, smacking his lips. "I can afford to eat some pie. I don't sit on my ass all day in an office, unlike _some_ people."

"I exercise at work whenever I want. One of the perks of owning the company." Billy sipped his coffee.

"Right. You wanna be able to fit into those skinny jeans." 

"These aren't skinny jeans."

Frank peered under the table at Billy's legs. "Oh. Are you wearing jeggings?"

"I am _not_ wearing jeggings." Billy leaned back and laughed. "These are regular jeans."

"Just regular jeans on a skinny guy," Frank said. Billy had never been brawny but he'd gotten noticeably thinner since Frank last saw him. Jesus, had it really been more than a year since Billy left the Corps?

"How do you even know about jeggings, Frank?"

"Lisa and her friends wear them." 

"Of course. You're plugged into the world of teenage girls."

"She's not a teenager-- yet."

"Trying to hang on to that pre-teen stage with your fingertips, huh?"

Every time Frank saw his kids, they were a few inches taller. Every time he saw them, they had new teachers, new friends, new sports, new after school activities. Maria always sent him pictures and videos and told him everything that was going on but it wasn't the same as being in the middle of it day-to-day. This afternoon, he asked Lisa how softball was going, not remembering that volleyball season had started.

"I just hate missing so much of them growing up," Frank said.

Billy slowly moved his half-empty mug in a circle. He looked at Frank and asked, "You thinking about getting out?"

Frank hadn't intended to talk about it tonight. But since Billy brought it up, he admitted, "Yeah."

"For real?"

"Yeah." Frank rubbed a thumb along the side of his mug. "Been thinking about it for a while."

Billy draped an arm over the back of the booth. "Have you talked about it with Maria?"

"Not yet." Maria had been wanting him to leave for a long time. If he brought it up while he was still undecided, they'd just have another argument. He needed to be sure he was ready to go when that conversation happened.

Frank told Billy about the last time he visited. He and Maria had gone to a pee-wee football game and the mother of one of the other players didn't recognize him. When his wife went to get some drinks, this woman approached her and, very suspiciously, asked who Frank was. 

Billy laughed. "This nosy soccer mom thought Maria brought some guy she was cheating on you with to her son's game?"

"And she didn't believe it was me," Frank added. 

Billy slapped the table. "Did she ask to see photo ID?"

"I think she would have if one of the other moms hadn't intervened."

"And why the hell didn't she believe Maria?"

"She probably got me confused with one of the other husbands who's deployed." Frank shrugged. "Or she's just terminally stupid." 

Shaking his head, Billy said, "Maria must've been pissed."

"Oh, she was." Frank thought it was funny.

"That would be a great headline." Billy held up his hands like he was framing the words. "'Marine and Wife Arrested for Brawling at Pee-Wee Football.'"

"That's the kind of thing that happens in Florida," Frank said. "We gotta be better than that."

When they finished laughing, Billy asked, "So you're thinking of finally leaving the Corps because some idiot hassled your wife?"

"Not that specifically." Frank rearranged his silverware on the table. "But my kids aren't going to be kids much longer. You know? Hell, since you got out, you see them more than I do."

Billy glanced around the restaurant like he was uncomfortable with that. "They always talk about _you_. They want me to tell 'em stories about their old man when he was young."

Frank pointed a spoon at Billy. "You better be careful which stories you're telling my kids, Russo."

"I haven't told them any of the bad ones." Billy tilted his head to the side. "Or, depending on how you look at it, the good ones." 

"Oh, I know which ones you think are the _good_ ones." 

Smiling wickedly, Billy said, "We made some memories together, huh?" 

"That we did, Bill." Most of them, combat-related or not, weren't things they could share with anyone else. He had missed Billy. Curt, too.

Billy asked, "So are you doing it? Are you getting out?"

Frank picked up the last bit of crust with his fingers and ate it. "I gotta retire eventually. I just need to decide if it's now or later."

"What would you do?"

"I have absolutely no idea." That was one of the reasons Frank hadn't left already.

"You could be a house husband," Billy suggested with a straight face.

Frank laughed. "I don't think that would work long-term."

"You'd have your kids getting up at 5 AM to do push-ups. They would start hating you."

"You remember Manny Lopez?" Billy nodded and Frank continued, "His family's got a construction business. I was thinking of asking if they need a hand."

Billy raised his eyebrows. "Seriously? You want to go from Force Recon to construction?"

"What's wrong with construction?"

"Jesus, Frankie."

"My dad was in construction." 

Billy gave him a _You cannot be serious right now_ look. The waitress made another round and poured more coffee. She asked if they wanted anything else and when they said no, she left the check.

"You could work with me," Billy said.

"I don't know."

"I pay well. The benefits are good. I know you have the skills."

Frank sipped his hot coffee. "When I'm out, I want to be _out_ ," he said.

Billy said, "I can respect that." But Frank knew he wasn't done with his pitch yet. "You know, Anvil does a lot of mundane, domestic jobs. Security, law enforcement training, bodyguard details. I go back to Afghanistan sometimes but you wouldn't have to."

"I don't know."

"We have contracts for providing dog show security," Billy said.

"Dog show security?"

"Yes."

"You are shitting me."

Billy tapped an index finger on the counter. "I'm serious. It's a very in-demand assignment. People argue over who gets to make sure nobody assassinates a toy poodle." Frank leaned his head against the back of his seat and laughed. Billy went on, "My entire staff is desperate to go pet these dogs."

"You're offering to put me on the dog petting squad?" Frank said.

"Not immediately. There's a waiting list. I can't be showing favoritism to my personal friends here."

Frank mopped up a little coffee he'd spilled on the table. "That's, uh, tempting." He was only half-joking.

"But the answer's no," Billy said.

"We've been friends for a long time, Bill. And I'm proud of you, you know, for building something of your own."

Billy cut in. "But we've always been equals and you don't want to work _for_ me."

"I'd rather find my own way and have us stay friends."

Nodding slowly, Billy said, "I get it."

He was still disappointed, Frank could tell. For a few moments, neither of them said anything. The college kids had left, leaving them as the only customers. The diner was very quiet now, the only sound water running and the clink of dishes in the kitchen.

Billy took a long drink and, wiping his mouth, said, "So your plan is to work construction until your back hurts too much and then retire? And then immediately die of a heart attack because you feel useless without a job?"

"I'm hoping to skip the back pain and the heart attack," Frank said.

"I _know_ you, Frankie boy. You'd never be satisfied with that."

Frank hadn't been satisfied with what he'd been doing for a while. Not since he joined Cerberus. For the first time in his career, he got orders he couldn't reconcile with what he thought was right. Before, he'd done things that would shock most people who'd never seen combat. But he never felt guilt over it. Killing people who were trying to kill you was one thing... Maybe Frank should have listened to Billy and got out. But he hadn't and he would have to live with that.

He moved his silverware around again, making random patterns. "It would be a way to make money, keep busy, while I figure out what to do with myself. You know, I've never actually had a civilian job. Not since I worked summers when I was in high school, anyway."

Billy asked, "So you're going to take some time for a little voyage of self-discovery?"

"You make it sound like some weird New Age thing when you say it like that," Frank scoffed.

Part of Frank worried that he'd never find a direction on his own, that he'd wander around aimlessly for the rest of his life. He had his family. That was the most important thing. But he would go stir crazy without _something_ to do beyond a regular nine-to-five. The problem was finding a thing that would give him as much as he got out of being a Marine. He had no idea what that was.

He still didn't really _want_ to leave. But now Billy's words echoed in his head more and more. _This whole thing is bullshit. We can't do this anymore!_

Frank asked, "How are things for you, Bill?"

"For me?"

"Yeah. You've been out for a while now."

"I'm not really the person to ask, Frank. Leaving the military and becoming a military contractor is basically cheating."

"Are you okay with it all?"

For a second, Billy looked tired. "Honestly, there are days I'd rather be back in. Being the boss, you gotta make all the decisions. Even if there aren't any good decisions to make." He sighed. "Listen to me, man, complaining about having my own successful company."

Frank looked at his friend. "Is it not what you expected?"

"Some of it is. But there's a lot of-- politics." 

"A lot of bullshit," Frank said.

Billy grinned and held up a finger, "Let me tell you one thing, though. Having money is better than _not_ having money." 

Frank snorted. "You always did have expensive tastes."

"You think Old Spice and PBR is _expensive_ , Frankie."

"I got a family. I can't spend all my money on making myself look good."

Leaning back against the booth, Billy said, "It amazes me how lucky you got finding a woman who'll put up with your shit. I mean, most marriages that start with a little _accident_ don't last."

As far as Frank was concerned, Lisa was the best "accident" that had ever happened in the history of the world. "Believe me, Bill, I know how lucky I am."

"You should talk to Curtis," Billy said abruptly. "He's connected with all kinds of veterans' programs in the city. Hell, he started like half of 'em. But he can help."

Frank drank the last of his coffee. "First, I have to talk to my wife."

"Maria will be _thrilled_." Billy paused. "Unless she gets annoyed having you around all the time and divorces you."

Shaking his head, Frank laughed. They made plans for Billy to get together with the family later in the week. By now, Frank was tired despite the caffeine, so he said, "I should get back."

Billy finished his cup and said, "Your wife's gonna think you're having an affair if you keep sneaking out in the middle of the night."

"I'll tell her I was with you."

"She'll start thinking _we're_ having an affair."

They both laughed. Frank took out his wallet to pay but Billy waved him off. "I got this." When Frank opened his mouth to argue, Billy said, "Save your money. You might be unemployed soon."

Billy left cash on the table (a 20 for a $6 bill, Frank noted) and the two of them went out into the night. At the end of the block, Billy stopped. "You want a ride home?"

"Nah. I feel like walking." 

Billy extended a hand and Frank took it and pulled him into a hug. "Don't be a stranger, Frank."

"You, either, Bill."

***

A crescent moon peeked through thin clouds overhead as Billy watched Frank walk off, then turned in the direction of his car. Seeing Frank again had been harder than he expected. Still, he was pleased. Almost all of Billy's best memories had been made with Frank. 

He didn't believe Frank would leave the Corps until it actually happened. Frank had talked about it before but missing his family never overrode his commitment to being a Marine. Still, something was different this time. Was it really because his kids were getting older? Or was what Cerberus had been doing finally getting even to Frank Castle?

Billy wished to hell that stubborn bastard had left the program with him. Together, they could have made it, like that night they'd survived being trapped in Basra. But, no, Frank had to stay. _Now_ he wanted out after the damage was done to both of them. And Frank thought he could just walk away, go home and play house with his family. No one who was involved would ever really be free of what had happened -- what they had done -- in Afghanistan. Frank was lying to himself if he thought otherwise. 

When Frank asked how he was doing, for a moment Billy wanted to tell him the truth. He'd gotten everything he ever wanted, only he'd started feeling like it wasn't what he wanted. At the time, the deal with Agent Orange seemed worth it. Billy would get the resources to become rich beyond his wildest dreams (and Billy's dreams could get pretty wild). In return, Anvil would do the dirty work for Rawlins. As Frank said, Billy didn't have anyone to look out for except himself. And it wasn't like he was doing anything worse than what he'd done for Cerberus. He was just getting paid properly for it now.

The problem was being shackled to that creep Agent Orange. There were days Billy considered taking the money in his office safe, getting a fake passport, and disappearing to Brazil or Switzerland or anywhere. Be free for a while before he died. Of course, if anyone could find him, it would be a corrupt CIA agent.

Arriving at his car, he opened the driver's side door and got in, then rested his hands on the steering wheel. In the end, it didn't make any difference that he had left and Frank had stayed. There wouldn't be a happy ending for either of them. All Billy could do was enjoy the ride while it lasted.

His phone buzzed. Not the phone he used to text Frank earlier, the other one. He sighed and pulled it out of the inside pocket of his jacket. Unknown Number was calling him-- Rawlins again. Sometimes Billy felt like he was married to that asshole. Maybe he should have let Frank kill him.

No one could change any of it now. He muttered, "Shit," and answered the phone.


End file.
